InsaneJournal

Video Game Love Part 4
And now, on to the Fables. To understand the full impact on how these games affected me please read the previous post.

BE WARNED. THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD.



Fable II was available for twenty bucks that Magni didn't actually have to pay for. It came with all the downloadable content and would be a game that changed how I played video games. For one, it's an Action RPG. What that means is that you play a character, and you push buttons to fight, and monsters can come out of anywhere, even behind you. These kind of games make me jump. I'm always trying to look all around me, turning the camera. The music. God, the music can get so distracting--distracting to the point where I can't focus because the music makes it scarier. The sound effects do the same thing.

Nothing is freakier than hearing hobbes and ghosts and not seeing them.

I get spooked very easily. I scream, I freak out, I have to pause and take deep breaths and calm down. I make my fingers hurt because I push the buttons HARDER when I freak out. And yes, I know it doesn't help, but instinct is instinct.

In short, I was more than a little hesitant to play it. I had played LoZ: Twilight Princess, which is also an Action RPG. But Fable II was a different scale. My brothers described LoZ:TP as "cake." Which is probably why I was okay. I also had help. Fable II was not going to be cake. And Magni probably wasn't going to help.

The story started out interesting and the first bit, the prologue, was pretty straightforward and definitely epically tragic. When the main arc of the story finally began and I realized I would be able to customize my character, I got excited. The voice acting was good. Already a plus. I was frustrated at my lack of money and clothing options, but if I got through the first section, I could buy stuff once I got to town.

Because here was the true draw of the game for me. It wasn't just CUSTOMIZING my character. It was the fact that...my character could be a GIRL. Now, I wouldn't consider myself a hardcore feminist. I love men. Men are tasty. I like a bigger, taller, powerful man. I like to feel protected and taken care of. But I want to have a career. I want to be my own person. I hate whimpering women and evil, sadistic bastard men. I like the protective, warrior man--probably why I like cops so much--and I like the independent woman. So, I like films and books and stories with a good, strong female lead. Not a woman who's really a dude in disguise, but a woman who is a WOMAN and can DO IT. No matter what anyone says. I like to watch films and anime with a female lead. I'm more invested. I live vicariously through her. I respect her and like her as the main character. I had friends that never liked to see women in anything. In anime or movies or games or books. They had no interest in women (from a purely heterosexual point of view I suppose) and they hated when there were because ultimately they were jealous. Instead of living vicariously like I did, they were all "why does she get him and not me? I'd rather have him date a dude then. Because she's an idiot and a bitch." Usually, my reaction was a silent "what the fuck?" and then promptly ignore. I still have friends who prefer to have a male lead in a film or in a game because it's "oooooh eye-candy for me," which I totally understand, because I can certainly appreciate the eye-candy. But I really love a great female main character. It makes me feel PROUD to be a woman, dammit.

And do you know how many video games--RPGs--I've played up until now with a female lead? One. Final Fantasy VI. And I didn't finish it. So playing Fable II wasn't compelling story-wise, or graphics-wise, or even character customization-wise. It was the fact that I was playing Sparrow the GIRL, who I could make to look like ME even! The hero of F2, the hero that was ME, was actually ME, dammit. Or at the very least, it was a damn CHICK. Because, goddamn, I wanted a strong female character who could SAVE THE WORLD. It didn't have to be a dude. IT COULD BE A CHICK.

I was sold. Even though I had to fight undead. And I hate undead.

Just so you know, fighting undead popping up out of the ground was kind of freaky. Right off the bat into that kind of crap... I guess to prepare me for the inevitable. By the time I got around to fighting bandits, I didn't feel too bad. Ha ha. But the part that started to make me feel better? The fact that I got through the skeleton and bug and creepy crawly infested underground sanctum of scary without dying. That. Was not something I expected. I felt confident. So even though I still jumped plenty and freaked out and moved and hollered and muted the thing when I got spooked--especially with those balverines. I HATE BALVERINES--I realized...that I could do this. And if I died, I came back but had scars. Oooooooooh~ That worked for me.

The story isn't fabulously complicated or in-depth, but it's interesting and fun and compelling enough to keep me going. The prologue certainly helped to drive you forward through the rest of the game, for certes. Nothing like vengeance to drive a story, I say! And, I will say, the story may not have been up to, say, LoZ:TP standards, but the ability to change your character's hair, clothes, make up, and dye it any which way you like, totally adds a level of fun that apparently I carry from childhood.

My mother likes to say, whenever there's a video game that customizes characters--like Rock Band for example--that we're just playing with our cuquitas. Cuquitas are what my mother calls muñecas de papel, i.e. paper dolls. There's something about putting together your own outfits and designing your own character that makes a game more fun. Paper dolls had their hay-day. Now, it's video games! So yeah, customizing my character was much like playing with my own 3D action cuquita. And I could have her battle and do expressions and play with her doll and blow kisses at dudes.

And ah, the downfall of the game. Cosmetically, it was fun to do all that with your character. Bad part? By the end of the game, my femme fatale looked more like a lady-dude bodybuilder. Not cool. The other downside? There are lots of pretty female people in Albion's cities and towns. But there isn't ONE good-looking man among all the men in this country. Actually, the one good-looking one is a douche and you would so rather kill him than touch him or work with him. Being voiced by Stephen Fry is his ONLY redeeming quality, but Stephen, being the incredible actor that he is, makes you hate Reaver more. And ultimately, Reaver isn't THAT good-looking. He's so utterly FOP that just...no. I was a big beefy girl. I wanted a big beefy dude. Hell, I was tempted to play a dude after just to see if I could have Hannah, the other big beefy chick in the story. But no. You can't romance the NPCs. So I figure, if I couldn't have Hannah as a dude or a chick, then I might as well play myself and have me and Hannah be BFFs. Which. We were. And it was awesome.

But yeah. No good-looking men in this game. They were all pretty ugly. And by the end of it, I was bigger and beefier than all of them. It took me forever to pick a dude to romance and marry. Ended up being a thug. He was a pale, foul-mouthed bastard, but he didn't wear a shirt and he wasn't too skinny. The rich men all wore wigs and frilly outfits and were too skinny or too fat and all...wimpish. Actually, I lie. There WERE hot men in the game. The GUARDSMEN. The local cops. Your town police force. Those were some large, handsome, beefy dudes. Guess what? Couldn't romance them. Why? 'Cause they're cops.

I was not a happy camper. But, I made do, as I said. Another thing about the game was it allowed you to be evil or good or neutral. I tried to be neutral. I was a thief and I definitely tried to manipulate things to fulfill my own ends, but a lot of times my sense of justice kicked in, or as it just so happened, when I manipulated things to my own ends it turned out to be the good way to do it. Other times, I'm sorry, but there was no way anyone was going to break MY spirit. So I ended up leaning toward good mostly.

Demon Doors made me jump ALL THE TIME. Damn things.

And that's another thing! THE SIDEQUESTS. Oh, I love sidequests! Especially these. Sometimes I didn't like how they ended, no matter what I chose, but still. Some were scary as hell. Some were cool. Some were hard. But all in all, they were all pretty fun. Some were the DLC (DownLoadable Content) stuff so they had cool little hidden things. Thank goodness for complete packaging, which, by the way, Xbox does NOT do unless the game is several years old. So. Don't buy any Xbox games until the game has been out for at least three to five years. You save a LOT of money that way.

Speaking of money, there were definitely interesting ways to make it. There were the jobs: bounty hunting, assassinations (all which sucked), slave trading and slave rescuing. You could sell stuff too. But the real way to make the big bucks... The real estate. Oh, the real estate! That's where the money is people. In REAL ESTATE. Own it, rent it, live it. Damn. Once I had property this place was MINE. I pretty much OWNED Albion. So by the end when I owned the palace and they were calling me QUEEN, I was all, "OH HOHOHOHOHOHO! You best BELIEVE IT!"

Honestly, best way to run a monarchy according to Fable II & III. Own all the real estate, charge decent rent rates, use all the money from the rent of everyone in the kingdom to fund everything else. Army, construction, local police force, schools. That's how I filled up the treasury in Fable III to protect everyone in the country from EVIL. I owned where they lived, they gave me money, I put that money in the treasury and then used it to do what they wanted to make them love me. Save the lake, get children out of factories and into schools, rebuild the orphanage, help protect the neighboring country, etc. Everyone loved me for doing what they wanted using the money they gave me. And why not? They gave me the gold, why not use what they gave me to do what they wanted?

It was really too easy to be good in Fable III. No hard choices really. And to be evil, in Fable III is really to just be a greedy fucktard. There's no real reason to ever be a douche bag. In Fable II you can get reasons real quick. I killed innocent people in Bloodstone. Usually when I was trying to upgrade their houses so their rent would go up--yes, I fixed up the houses and gave them new furniture; I had the money, why not?--they would tell me to leave. When I didn't go right away, they'd shoot at me. So. I'd shoot back and usually blow their head off.

Luckily! I had a new tenant in there REAL fast, so I didn't lose a dime. Game mechanics. Ha.

By the time I convinced Magni to get Fable III not only was I excited to play my F2 character's child, but I wanted to play a girl that wouldn't become a muscled man with boobs. Some things were better in F3 than in F2. Graphics. Hobbes weren't as scary. A few great hat tips and references to the previous game. Being able to play co-op with Magni with my heroine and his hero. Picking up my kids and hugging people and kissing them...

And that was about it. Side quests were lacking, the Demon Doors were definitely not as cool, the story was blah, you STILL couldn't romance the NPCs, there were STILL no good-looking beefy dudes, but at least they made the local cops not as attractive so I didn't feel so bad not having one. They give you a "childhood sweetheart" in this game which could either be your BFF if you want to play a gay character or your honey if you want to play a straight. I played it straight, but I still gave him up later because...well, he's a bit of a pansy ass. Now, the chick version (for people who play guys)--Elise versus my sad Elliot--was very pretty and her dialogue made sense. For a chick. Elliot was too pretty with this slick haircut and just...a pansy foo-foo. And then he says the same dialogue that Elise does. Which makes him look even more like a pansy. So I gave him up when it came to deciding to keep him or not. It was also about halfway through the game (though at the time I thought it was still pretty early) when I had to make this decision, so I thought there might be better looking guys in the near future.

I was hopeful.

My mistake. Not only was that HALFWAY THROUGH rather than, you know, a quarter like I thought, but no. There were no other good looking every day guys. There was Ben Finn voiced by Simon Pegg. Oh, oh, did I want him. But no. Couldn't have him. Figured. In retrospect, I should've stuck with Elliot. As much of a pansy as he is, he's better than anybody else in Albion. Or. At least. Anyone I'm allowed to woo.

The game was ridiculously short, and not only did you have to pay $70 for the game, but if you wanted anything EXTRA that SHOULD'VE come with the game (like hairdos and ink to dye your clothes) you had to pay EXTRA for it. It demanded that you play online with people you didn't know, trying to force you to MMORPG, but you couldn't do that unless you had an Xbox Live Gold Membership account which cost about $80 a year to have. DLCs cost a lot of money, when they finally came out. The game was also glitchy as hell. Also, you only had two choices of weapons for ranged and melee, unlike in the previous game where you could have several different kinds, and each weapon did specific things that you couldn't change or customize (like you could in the previous game), which meant you had to have several weapons and sometimes had to interchange them in the middle of battle in order to get the effect you wanted. Icing to that particular cake is that you had to "level them up" in order to get the full benefit and, let me tell you, leveling those weapons up was NOT easy. Especially with WEIRD requirements.

Like sleeping with 15 men.

By the way, there are not enough bisexual or loose heterosexual men in the game to be able to do that with. There aren't even enough male whores. You've gotta be tricky and drag one male whore away so he can respawn and you can drag that NEW one away and then he'll respawn and then you can drag that third, have yourself a foursome, and you're a fifth of the way down. Good luck finding 12 straight or bi men that are loose though.

I assure you, it wasn't easy, and not worth it. I replaced that pistol soon after. When I finally got married to my Auroran husband after not having sex for quite a while...guess what? HE gave me the STD. What the hell? Like I said, the game is glitchy. But there was another good thing about it. Your character spoke now, instead of like in F2 where you didn't. So during sex instead of hearing one side of the passion, you could now hear both.

Oh, and if you, dear reader, didn't know this, sorry to break it to you like this kind of abruptly. These games have whores. Male and female ones. The male ones in BOTH games are just...not cool. Kind of scary. So yeah. Whores. Which means... You can have sex. As much as you want. And children if you don't use condoms. You can be gay or bi or straight. You can get married. As many times as you want depending if you want to be a bastard and make your wife or husband divorce you. Or you could just kill them, like my brother did once. Your kids grow up fast, but then don't grow anymore. You can adopt in F3. You can steal, lie, kill and pretty much do anything you want. Good or bad. Once, in F2, I tried to upgrade a house in Oakfield. She didn't shoot me, like they do in Bloodstone, she called the Watch. I got fined for trespassing. Me. The landlord in the middle of making her house prettier. What did I do? I paid the fine and then upped her rent to the max. The called it corrupt in the game. I called it justice being served thank you very much.

Oh, the fun in real estate~!

By the way, the bombing of undead of Fable III while fun, is one of the most IMPOSSIBLE BLOODY MINIGAMES IN THE WHOLE GAME. Not cool. They took all the fun out of it by making the mandatory points gained in that game to upgrade your guns an IMPOSSIBLE number. You have to kill 1000 undead. Pretty much impossible with the time limit and the bad habit of the buggers to wander off alone making you waste bombs and time on just one or two of them.

I know I've talked a lot about the Fable games' content, but you have to understand that for me, being able to get all this information and all this content is a miracle. It's so very hard for me to play this kind of game...but I got it and I did it and I beat it and I played it. An action game with UNDEAD and GHOSTS and creepy scary HOBBES. I don't even know HOW I did it. It's a miracle. I managed to get to do all of this...usually without dying and all the time without getting bored. In fact, I had to force myself to stop usually so I could go back to job hunting.

The games, for all their problems, were good, enjoyable games that I've been considering replaying. I don't know if I can. God knows if I can't get the hairdo and items and weapons I have in my first game of Fable III (which I got through online finagling) into my second game of Fable III, I probably won't play the damn thing again. I should probably wait until more stuff is free with that game anyway, but, I must admit, I've been curious to replay both 2 & 3 to see how I feel about them now. I played and finished them not that long ago, but they've got some replay value and I did have fun doing it and I can't help but wonder what it would be like now.

Now that my video gaming playing has...evolved.

The Fable games were dynamic, fun, different and gave me a new appreciation for an action game where I could play a woman--and a woman I could customize into my own personal person. I could be a hero and not have to worry about the issue of talking to real people and the extensiveness and expensiveness of an MMORPG. I could just play a normal video game as a heroine who could save the world.

You can't beat that!

...Or can you?


TO BE CONTINUED...





COMING SOON:

-Dragon Age: Origins/Awakening

~~~


QUOTES OF THE DAY: (because women deserve MORE dammit)

"You don't have to be anti-man to be pro-woman." ~Jane Galvin Lewis

"To tell a woman everything she may not do is to tell her what she can do." ~Spanish Proverb

"Women are not inherently passive or peaceful. We're not inherently anything but human." ~Robin Morgan

"I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a door mat or a prostitute." ~Rebecca West